HAPPY HOUR ODYSSEY 2024
By John Kruxhammer
Audacious author of HEARTBREAK EPIPHANIES AND JUSTIFIED LUST
Beer and a tune, life is good. That so damn much to ask?
Endless quest for best Happy Hours in Vegas—and beyond!
Any great Happy Hours to recommend?
Contact: birdseyebeyond@gmail.com
Been to a lot of Happy Hours. I know what I like.
Score based on four priorities:
Beer, 4.0
Music, 3.0
Other stuff, 2.0
Atmosphere, 1.0
Maximum total: 10.0
Would be a lot easier if those who liked my book just showed up at the library and told me who they are. But if I have to go to every Happy Hour in Vegas, and beyond, to find some of them, I suppose that’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.
Rockhouse, at Venetian Casino
Date, time, place: 22 April, 1:45 pm, 3377 S. Las Vegas Blvd.
Moon phase, illumination: full moon, 97%
Elapsed time for first beer: 3 minutes 0 seconds
3.5, Beer
2.5, Music
1.5, Other stuff
1.0, Atmosphere
8.5 Total
It was a real adventure just getting there. Experienced a 20-minute delay due to maintenance issue with the monorail. Then, when walking along the Strip, I stepped on a metal grate. Surprisingly, a strong updraft blew my fedora straight up, rest of my hair flying around too. After turning around to search, it landed flat, right in front of me. No damage to the feather and no one stepped on the hat. Lucky day. Not long after, found two seats at the bar, not too crowded on a Monday afternoon, happy hour from 11 am to 7 pm. Hurricane Sue and I both started with Battleborn Lager, from Reno, one of the beers on special for $5. Tasted good on a warm sunny afternoon, with entrance doors open, nice breeze blowing through. Pleasant, mostly light rock music played at loud enough volume.
No video poker machines in the black polished bar counter. So that was good. However, six big-screen TVs for a medium bar seating only 16 was excessive in my opinion. A couple walls were more interesting, with colorized head shots of celebrities, such as Elvis, Marilyn Monroe, Dean Martin, Andy Warhol, plus many others, even O. J. Simpson who died 12 days ago. Second beer, Elysian Space Dust IPA, which I thoroughly enjoyed, washing down an appetizing hamburger and fries, also on special. The bald female bartender, Cassie, was friendly but busy. After I paid the tab, she recommended more good happy hours downtown.
Happy Earth Day, this odyssey continues!
The Hideout
Date, time, place: 8 April, 11:00 am, 2311 S. Casino Dr., Laughlin, NV
Moon phase, illumination: new moon, 0%; solar eclipse
Elapsed time for first beer: 2 minutes 38 seconds
3.5, Beer
2.5, Music
2.5, Other stuff
1.0, Atmosphere
9.5 Total
Entered this spacious second-floor bar and started with a pint of Modelo, surprisingly good. Not only did bartender provide a coaster, also handed out special dark sunglasses for the solar eclipse. Her name not Blondie, but Ondie, something else unusual. First song I heard playing was “Twilight Zone” by Golden Earring, one of my favorites, with plenty more to follow, although prefer the volume louder. Usually don’t drink whiskey, but 11:19 am was maximum eclipse of 55% from our Nevada location. So, I celebrated with shots of Fireball for me and another patron named Tony, a skilled tradesman, telling stories of construction projects near and far, plus how his grandfather in Missouri taught him valuable expertise at a young age.
The bartender brought me another Modelo, which I didn’t ask for so doesn’t count. Next I chose Voodoo Ranger IPA, and eventually got around to Corona Light. Maybe something about a lunar event, but these beers tasted great, almost as if directly from a microbrewery. Happy Hours here are an amazing 8 am to 4 pm, Monday through Friday, especially suited to my habit of starting early and finishing early. Also enjoyed gorgeous views of desert mountains to the east, past the Colorado River, with casinos bordering the shore. Also watched a Sun Country jetliner taking off in blue sky with a full load of gamblers from the Laughlin/Bullhead City airport.
The bar with a solid gold-colored footrail had room for 30 or 40 customers, and plenty other space, with a door to the balcony on a pleasant sunny day. Enough seats without video poker screens, so that was good, especially high top tables. Had a great time. Usually don’t give more than 2.0 for ‘Other Stuff’ category, but when the bartender provides darkened glasses to safely view a solar eclipse, even a partial one, that is going far above normal service.
12 Gates Brewing Company
Date, time, place: 27 March, 5:30 pm, 80 Earhart Dr., Williamsville, NY
Moon phase, illumination: waning gibbous, 96%
Elapsed time for first beer: 1 minute 18 seconds
3.5, Beer
2.5, Music
2.0, Other stuff
1.0, Atmosphere
9.0 Total
Fortunately, their Happy Hour goes from 4 to 7 pm on Wednesdays. I started with House Lager Pilsner, adequate. I liked the music selection, light rock, but prefer a bit louder. Nice tall glass, with customized coaster. Solid wood counter, sturdy foot rail, rapid fire chatter between female bartender and female customer, impossible to keep up with, though soon ready for another drink. I picked their Buzz the Tower, hazy IPA, first rate, excellent taste. Two TVs mounted high above, not distracting from the bar name and plentiful taps in the center. Also, could see tall shiny vats behind floor to ceiling glass windows. Surely better than annoying commercials!
April, the bartender, very personable, even reminded everyone of last beers before Happy Hour over. No passing that up, ordered Abominable IPA, another high-quality selection. Plenty of customers, more friendly than usual, much laughter, great sense of humor. I suppose I can allow that. One couple, named George and Melissa, had 18 warmed-up cookies delivered in a pizza box, which they shared with everyone. First time I ever saw that in a bar. Not quite ‘icing on the cake’, but were a perfect treat while finishing my beer.
Tim Ho Wan, Palms Casino
Date, time, place: 29 February, 3:45 pm, 4321 W. Flamingo Rd.
Moon phase, illumination: waning gibbous, 79%
Elapsed time for first beer: 6 minutes 43 seconds
1.5, Beer
1.0, Music
1.0, Other stuff
0.5, Atmosphere
4.0 Total
Good thing a leap day like this only comes every four years, since this visit did not turn out well. Took a long time waiting to get seated for two openings at the bar. This place was more of a restaurant, but mention of a Happy Hour on their website made me curious. After a longer than usual wait to get served, Sapporo draft was plain, no coaster. Hurricane Sue’s Kirwin Ichiban tasted a little better, but just average. Background music came from the adjacent casino space, while the small bar area was brightly lit as if in a hospital, although the food did look great. But we weren’t here for that. Interesting Japanese knick-knacks were on display, and a high wall on far side was painted in a puzzling combination of light green mountains and trees, with a block of Japanese writing, and in the foreground bright red fish with fluffy tails, among tall grasses.
Bartender way too busy for any interaction, although did inform me when handing the bill that there was no Happy Hour, unlike what I read online. After doublechecking, sure enough, their location in California had a Happy Hour. Okay, he said the place next door, Mabel’s BBQ had one though. So, we went over, found last two seats at a crowded bar with better music playing, and enjoyed a couple beers. Apparently, this rare leap day also meant rare disappointment, since by the way when time to pay, no Happy Hour. First time been tricked twice in the same night.
Rickety Cricket
Date, time, place: 21 February, 3:45 pm, 532 Beale St., Kingman, AZ
Moon phase, illumination: waxing gibbous, 92%
Elapsed time for first beer: 1 minutes 48 seconds
4.0, Beer
3.0, Music
2.0, Other stuff
1.0, Atmosphere
10.0 Total
Due for some good beers and I drove to the right place, after first encountering a detour for road construction on the same block. Thought they might not even be open, but was able to circle back from opposite direction. First choice Hippie Bus Pale Ale, fresh brewed, nice and cold. Favorite classic rock music loudly played inside this warehouse type environment with a bar, tables and chairs, booth, shiny kegs stacked high, vats, and even a pizza oven kitchen area. Plus, fully restored red and white Volkswagen van by far wall. From where I sat, only one TV mounted off to the side, with one more above and another behind, so I was not looking at any screens when drinking. Perfect.
Second selection, Anaconda Squeeze IPA, incredibly good. Not only that, fantastic! I asked the bartender, Amanda, if they usually played classic rock and she said whatever the owner felt like. Enjoy now, but don’t always count on it. I also learned they have Happy Hour, noon to 6 p.m., Sunday to Friday. What’s not to like?
After ordering my next choice, Antonio Blonderas Blonde Ale, I noticed rain pouring down outside with sunshine as well. Just as I’m wondering if there’s a rainbow somewhere, Amanda points one out through the big window behind me. Tough to beat that. Combined with raising the music volume even louder, I found it very difficult to leave. So I stayed, and asked for one more small pour, Kingman Club Kolsch, top notch just like the others. I will be back.
Yard House
Date, time, place: 17 January, 3:10 pm, 3545 S. Las Vegas Blvd.
Moon phase, illumination: waxing crescent, 43%
Elapsed time for first beer: 4 minutes 48 seconds
3.5, Beer
3.0, Music
1.5, Other stuff
1.0, Atmosphere
9.0 Total
First choice, Great Basin Ichthyosaur Icky IPA, pretty good. Sue had House Honey Blond, excellent for that type. Music played at proper loudness, with many favorite rock selections. When getting first beer, bartender mentioned this the only Yard House location WITHOUT a Happy Hour, which I did not recall on their website. However, beers only about $7, a good price for the Strip. Especially since the bartender readily provided IPA samples to choose from to begin with.
Shiny stainless-steel countertop, coasters, good ambiance, with comfortable leather cushioned seats on bar stools. Small TVs, three above each side of long bar. Annoying, but not distracting. About 150 taps on display, although Rogue Dead Guy Ale and another selection I asked about were not available. So, when in Vegas, don’t believe everything you see.
Second beer, Gaffel Kolsch, almost excellent, a bit flat, but with a cold glass and distinctive flavor, tasted fine. Sue’s Kona Big Wave Golden Ale was excellent. After enough water, could not leave without trying Yard House Give ‘Em Helles lager. I liked it.