John Kruxhammer 2022
Book Launch Appearances
Date, time, place: June 4th, 6 pm, Las Vegas private residence near W. Craig Rd. and N. Fort Apache Rd.
Moon phase: waxing crescent, 21% illumination
Countdown to book launch: 119 days
The wedding at Pete’s large home was billed as ‘Party of the Year.’ It did not disappoint. A line formed at the bartender station for mixed drinks, but I was happy to see several metal ice coolers filled with beer from Tenaya Creek Brewery. After Pete and his beautiful bride Ali enthusiastically greeted Sue and I, we continued wandering by the koi pond, inside the air-conditioned house, then back out past the main seating area tables with adjoining ice cream vendor, photographer with props, dance area, then large garage with games for kids and adults. This place even had first-rate portable bathrooms farther back.
After the joyful couple got married around 7 p.m., this party really got going. As expected, Hurricane Sue was first on the dance floor. The ‘exuberant’ groom appeared and readily danced along. Not sure the bride appreciated missing the first dance, but hard to hold back Sue from any dance floor with lively music. She’s a force of nature.
Since at a wedding, I told my wedding joke. “Why did the best man bring a loaf of bread to the reception?”
When no one responded, I answered, “So he could make the toast.”
I then made a quick escape to the dance floor with Sue as the DJ played excellent rock music. Then he had the nerve to play music from this century, so we cooled off by going inside to the dessert table. Soon after, we went back out where a dozen people gathered by high top tables for a group picture, along with greatly ‘energized’ Pete, bursting with joy, although his balance not the best. One quick stumble brought him and Hurricane Sue crashing down with a table, all flat on the ground. Maybe bride’s revenge for not getting first dance?
Anyway, Pete apologized, a bit chagrined, and disappeared to collide with other objects. Sue got back on her feet, thankfully unhurt, and danced around. No wonder football is her favorite sport, bouncing back from a tumble like that. I tried keeping up with Sue, but when the music briefly halted, I hinted maybe she was getting tired. Nice try. I had to fake a stomach-ache. To show further how such a wonderful host, the music from Pete’s party was shared with the entire neighborhood, even two blocks away in the dark where our car was parked.
We had a good time.
Date, time, place: July 22nd, 4 pm, Tenaya Creek Brewery, 831 W. Bonanza Rd.
Moon phase: waning crescent, 30% illumination
Countdown to book launch: 70 days
When first stepping though the door, I was greeted by one of the regulars who repeatedly bent forward, bowed his head, and stretched out arms in a manner of jesting worship. But before I got too satisfied with myself he pointed to the large Tupperware container I was carrying filled with delicious pad thai made by Hurricane Sue. All other customers who eventually tried it complimented her on the taste as well. I know it went very good with beer, along with favorite lively music.
Hard to compete with her cooking, but several potential readers showed interest in the book. We had a nice conversation with the owner, Tim Etta, as he almost finished the large amount of pad thai that Sue gave him. Combined with excellent attention from two or our favorite and long-known bartenders on duty, we could not have asked for a better early beginning to this book celebrating adventure.
Bottom line, we had a good time.
Date, time, place: July 23rd, 4 pm, Las Vegas Brewing Company, 3101 N. Tenaya Way
Moon phase: waning crescent, 22% illumination
Countdown to book launch: 69 days
Hurricane Sue and I stepped inside, looking for a server named Evelyn, who had expressed interest in the book before it was ready. We took seats at the bar and enthusiastically revealed it. This young woman looked puzzled and confused, like not knowing what we were talking about. That’s because it wasn’t her! Thought I was doing pretty good remembering names lately, but apparently also important to match them to the correct person as well.
Fortunately, Evelyn showed up soon after and was far more receptive. Not long after, in between serving patrons in the dining area, she paid for the book and was so appreciative even posed for a photo with it. This will be very awkward if she ends up not liking it.
In this challenging writing game, you get lots of foul tips, missed swings, and strikeouts. Even hit by pitch sometimes. But when you do find that occasional eager reader, it feels like a home run. Signing a book for her was the culmination of countless hours of solitary effort and future intentions. After Evelyn’s shift ended, another server started, although he didn’t recognize my writer ‘uniform’ until noticing Hurricane Sue with me. Robb also got a signed copy and expressed great interest.
Two home runs in the same game! When the ZZ Top song “Sharp Dressed Man’ played, Sue and I could not help but dance. despite surprised looks by others. We then went back to a tasty burger and excellent beers. Perhaps not every book celebration appearance will be so wonderful, but ones like this make them all worthwhile.
We had a good time.
Date, time, place: August 11th, 4:30 pm, Nine Fine Irishmen, New York New York Hotel Casino, 3790 Las Vegas Blvd. S.
Moon phase: full, 100% illumination
Countdown to book launch: 51 days
When Hurricane Sue and I arrived, we found out no Happy Hour anymore. Shocking, but we continued anyway. When seats opened at this fine bar, I ordered Harp and Sue enjoyed Stella Artois, with pleasant Irish music playing. A guy with a hummingbird tattoo on his right shoulder took a seat next to me. His name was Jason, who passed us a business card. After I did the same, he asked if I was a ‘birder,’ due to ‘birdbeyond@outlook.com’ for email address. Although viewing many large graceful ones as a hiker, I could not claim to be a birder, those who travel to often remote locations in hopes of spotting rare species.
Jason’s card said ‘Hacker in Residence’ for a company in California. He was in Vegas to make a presentation at the Mandalay Bay Blackhat Conference, in its 25th year, for the cyber-security community. Apparently, he spent a great deal of time traveling around the world as one of the top experts in his field, including Bangkok, which especially interested Sue. He gave inside details about the conference, including a contest on large video screens of ‘spotting the Feds’ (similar use of birder skills) and figuring out how to make the Mandalay Bay elevator go all the way to the restricted top floor Foundation Room, with its $25,000 membership fee. When in New York City, Jason devised a ruse to gain access to elevators in a large financial firm, plant a monitoring device, and later retrieve it with sensitive information from phones of executives who work on highest floors. He also handled security improvement for a large New York art museum. Like I told him, good thing he’s working on our side of the law. He drank Guinness.
Hurricane Sue bought another round. Then Jason went off to Caesar’s Palace to meet with friends for picking locks on electronic devices. Sue wanted to explore somewhere else, so we went outside to a lengthy park area and found Beerhaus. I had a big meal earlier, and was not driving, since we were staying at New York New York. Classic rock music played nice and loud. Met more people interested in the book. So, I had an idea—let’s drink some more! Blame it on the full moon. That was not a good idea. The moon reached full ‘brilliance’ at 6:39 and so did I.
I woke up next morning seriously reminded why the theme to Birds-eye & Beyond is ‘Celebration of HEALTH and Freedom.’ I found out, again, about drinking too much, and trying to keep up with Hurricane Sue. So now I certainly know—don’t go to Nine Fine Irishmen and then Beerhaus . . . on a Thursday, in August, when there’s a full moon!
Felt bad all that day. But before then, we had a good time.
Date, time, place: August 25th, 4 pm, Yard House at Red Rock Casino, 11011 W. Charleston Blvd.
Moon phase: waning crescent, 3% illumination
Countdown to book launch: 36 days
I don’t know of any ‘Stairway to Heaven’ but we did find our ‘Portal to Paradise’ passing through a long corridor between rows of glass-enclosed temperature-controlled stainless steel beer kegs. As I feared during popular Happy Hour, the bar was nearly full. Fortunately, a friendly patron agreed to move over one stool so Hurricane Sue and I could sit adjacent.
The woman to my right inquired about this ‘Great American Novel’ we were celebrating and offered to buy one, while her husband pulled out the money. So, of course, I enthusiastically talked more about it until she changed her mind. Here’s an idea. Next time, just say ‘thank you’ and change the subject. For instance, Yard House website claims over a hundred beers on tap. But from what I seen might be only 99. Best way to clear up that discrepancy will be another visit!
Hurricane Sue ordered a tasty Honey Blonde and I got reacquainted with fabulous Kronenbourg 1664, first made in the Alsace region of France by Master Brewer Geronimus Hatt, using exact same recipe today. Impressive. We enjoyed friendly service and could have enjoyed classic rock music better if it wasn’t for three guys at nearby corner of the bar stuck in loud auto-babble about fantasy football. Women are supposedly more talkative than men, but I think these boozy dudes could out jabber a full crowd of females at a bridal show.
Second round was another old favorite, Dogfish Head 60 Minute IPA, while Sue chose a dependable German pilsner. Went good with half-price pizza. Several patrons and staff said they liked to read, so I handed out business cards. Innumerable books in this world but you know what makes this one most appealing? Going to all these Happy Hours, we’re sure to find out from somebody!
Regardless of ‘results,’ we had a good time.
Date, time, place: September 9th, 3 pm, Beerhaus, 3784 S. Las Vegas Blvd.
Moon phase: waxing gibbous (nearly full), 99% illumination
Countdown to book launch: 21 days
Arrived early and strolled through Park MGM Hotel Casino to the Aria. Before going to one Happy Hour, might as well look for others. A strong breeze outside on the way back tested whether my purple feather stayed attached to the hat, and fortunately did. It also stayed on when later reaching down from the bar and the hat fell off. Good to know in case of scuffling with any gang of literary critics about misuse of grammar in my unconventional book.
I challenged Hurricane Sue to choose the best seats, a crucial decision for optimal discussion. At one point we had to flee from an older lonely guy continually babbling, but overall struck up some good conversations with polite interest in my ‘potential best seller.’
Two men from Germany showed up wearing matching hats, so I no longer the only one. At least neither was an acclaimed writer mocking my ‘probable failure.’ Instead of wanting to read a book with plenty beer drinking and rock music, they were already drinking—and then going to a rousing Motley Crue concert at nearby Allegiant Stadium. No writing can compete with that, so with an upraised fist when parting I proclaimed ‘Las Vegas, greatest city in the world!’ Those unable to continue enjoying all this town has to offer can at least relive by reading it. Just Google John Kruxhammer. And what better way to pass time flying to or from Vegas, than with Heartbreak Epiphanies And Justified Lust?
Drank beer, had a burger, heard music, we had a good time.
Date, time, place: September 30th, 4:30 pm, PT’s Sierra Gold, 2400 N. Buffalo Drive
Moon phase: waxing crescent, 23% illumination
Countdown to book launch: LIFTOFF!
When ready to leave for this long-anticipated party, I found out Hurricane Sue’s ’73 Cadillac Seville did not have working air conditioning. In nearly 100-degree heat, it came down to the Cadillac or the cake. In order not to melt the frosting, we used my vehicle.
Rest of the night went much smoother, a culmination of persistent, often difficult writing, spanning decades, resulting in a profound sense of fulfillment. Most sensible people would have just given up. Sue’s unwavering support was a huge help. When pausing the music and gathering our guests, I expressed gratitude for this amazing woman. And explained that I see “Hurricane Sue” as a real force of nature, but in a positive not destructive way.
Not as many people as expected, but we had just as much fun. In this luxurious room I announced my new concept for a ‘Happy Hour Guru’ to evaluate best places in Vegas, providing a needed service for visitors and locals alike. You’re welcome. I’ve been to lots of Happy Hours over the years. I know what I like.
After more than two hours of pizza, wings, drinks, and classic rock, a limo bus took some of us for a scenic drive along the Strip, while sipping champagne and other booze. Went to the ‘Welcome to Las Vegas’ sign, and later passed by world-famous water fountain show at the Bellagio. So many wonderful memories in this exciting city. And not done yet!
